We’ve all most likely dreamt about it: waking up after a restful night time’s sleep, with no alarms blaring and no work emails ready to be answered. A day free to journey within the daylight, hit the fitness center throughout its quiet hours, and focus solely on our bodily targets—undisturbed by Slack messages, deadlines and the fixed pressures of labor. For these of us squeezing in an hour on the coach within the basement earlier than or after work, the lifetime of a full-time skilled athlete looks like a distant dream – one which comes with a promise that we might lastly unlock our full potential as a result of we’d have the time.
For years, Maude Farrell juggled a demanding profession in tech with high-level racing – each as an off-road bike racer and an ultrarunner. She managed it effectively, too, competing within the Life Time Grand Prix for 2 years, netting a top-10 end result at Unbound Gravel and touchdown on the rostrum at occasions just like the Vermont Overland and Crusher within the Tushar. Then, in early 2024, she unexpectedly misplaced her job. What appeared like a setback shortly turned a uncommon alternative. Relatively than leaping into a brand new position, she determined to concentrate on her athletic pursuits full-time.
However the expertise didn’t go as imagined: the absence of a job didn’t end in improved athletic efficiency.
The Dream vs. The Actuality
(Picture credit score: Dominique Powers // Rapha)
“I had been curious what it will really feel wish to solely be an athlete however I used to be not courageous sufficient to stop my job and depart my company profession behind to pursue athletics,” Farrell tells Biking Weekly. “Being laid off, it was a selection that was made for me.”
Farrell knew she was in a spot in her life the place she may maintain this dream for one yr, so she determined to present it a go.
“I used to be actually excited,” she recollects. “In my head, the story was going to be like ‘Maude unleashes this wonderful success story’.”’
The fact?
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“The exhausting reality was that, really, I did nearly nearly as good as I did after I additionally had a full-time job.”
The realisation hit exhausting. Farrell had constructed a story in her thoughts {that a} singular focus would result in important development and outcomes. She kicked off the season in March with an enormous win on the Mid South Double—a 50K path operating race adopted by a extremely aggressive 100-mile gravel bike race the following day. However because the season continued, the outcomes didn’t come.
“That was actually tough to undergo. Lastly, this second is right here. It is in my palms. I haven’t got this different distraction, I haven’t got this different power sink. I can put all of it into this one place. And it did not manifest,” Farrell says.
“I spent plenty of the yr feeling annoyed that the story I had written of what could be on the opposite facet wasn’t coming true. And I feel that we get caught up in these fantasies and this concept of what might be. I feel what I realized about myself is that [being a full-time athlete] possibly is not my recipe for fulfillment. I do not know that placing my whole concentrate on a single factor empowers me to succeed.”
A Multi-Sport Athlete With a Multi-Faceted Thoughts
(Picture credit score: Dominique Powers // Rapha)
Farrell, now 33, grew up operating in highschool and competed in Division III cross-country in school earlier than accidents led her to biking. Even then, she struggled with the stress of efficiency, recalling moments of full “efficiency paralysis” throughout checks in highschool and school. That very same aggressive pressure adopted her into bike racing.
“When I’m in an setting that is not fully and solely concerning the consequence, I do carry out higher,” she says. “ When racing this previous yr, I wasn’t doing any higher as a result of I put a lot expectation on my journey. One may argue shedding your job and changing into a professional athlete is like the final word freedom but it surely didn’t really feel like freedom.”
Removed from feeling liberated, Farrell discovered herself spiralling.
“Was it nice to have the ability to get up and go journey in the course of the day and never fear about whether or not I used to be on Slack or not? Yeah, after all! Nevertheless it additionally felt like I used to be unmoored. I had the liberty however I feel I want guardrails,” she says.
“I walked away so grateful I had that likelihood, but additionally realised that it does not work for me…and it clearly does not work for my checking account.”
“One may argue shedding your job and changing into a professional athlete is like the final word freedom but it surely didn’t really feel like freedom.”
Farrell says {that a} full season of racing—factoring in entry charges, journey, lodging, and related prices—units her again as much as $18,000 per yr. Even with the backing of sponsors like Rapha and Allied Cycle Works, she barely breaks even. Thus, a job is critical, however even when she abruptly had one million {dollars} within the financial institution, Farrell admits she most likely wouldn’t go for the full-time athlete life once more.
“I feel I’m not the champion one that can laser into this one factor and simply pursue that. I’ve to have a breadth of issues,” she says.
Now, as she heads into a brand new season of racing, Farrell is absolutely embracing her multifaceted life, juggling greater than ever—a brand new job, newly married life, new sponsors, and an bold race calendar, together with her largest operating problem but: the 100-kilometer Leadville Problem. Surprisingly, she’s discovering that having extra on her plate really brings her stability, stating:
“I do suppose that work makes me a greater athlete. It sort of offers me an anchor, however then vice versa, using offers me an anchor for work. I do not suppose it is about me balancing issues. I feel that collectively, they create a stability for me, ?”
What Defines Success?
(Picture credit score: Dominique Powers // Rapha)
Farrell is the primary to confess that her multi-sport, multi-faceted juggling act is likely to be preserving her from profitable extra races.
“Actually each night time as I go to sleep, I feel, ‘Properly, for this reason I don’t win issues,’” she admits with fun.
“I do not know which one comes first: speaking myself out of being a winner and, subsequently, justify spreading myself skinny throughout all these sports activities. Or if spreading myself skinny throughout all these sports activities is why I am not probably the most winningest individual. I do not know, however I am okay.”
To Farrell, being an expert athlete isn’t nearly outcomes. It’s about pushing her personal limits, studying extra about herself, and discovering pleasure within the course of.
“ I actually do get a way of objective and satisfaction from the pursuit of my very own self-discovery—of coming to an understanding of what I can do, that I’m able to a sure feat. That is a very, actually satisfying factor,” she says.
“Each sports activities psych will inform you: The much less you chase the outcomes, the extra the outcomes come. While you concentrate on pursuing one thing inside your self, an effort, a sense–it is loopy that it does unlock an consequence.”
So come autumn, Farrell is not going to be measuring her success in podium finishes. For her, success will imply staying injury-free, finishing her longest operating race but, and, above all, ending the season excited for the following one.
By stepping away from the normal “professional athlete” script, Farrell is carving her personal path—one which embraces the stability of profession, sport, mates, and household. Her rewards might not come within the type of many medals, however reasonably in pleasure, problem, self-discovery, and, hopefully, longevity.
